Giveaway of the Day Forums » General discussion

BBQ Rules for this summer

(39 posts)
  • Started 1 year ago by Whiterabbit-uk
  • Latest reply from ch33to

  1. Violet4714
    Member

    hmm...

    Apgar score>>>An assessment of the physical condition of a newborn infant; involves heart rate and muscle tone and respiratory effort and color and reflex responsiveness

    so you looked like a chipmunk to the midwife, but actually had no DNA based reason to?...do you still have chipmunk tendencies, or did you grow out of it?...not my business, i know...but it is a curious condition to have...

    as far as i know, my grandfather was not a hobo...just a poor family in the UP of michigan (yoopers)...i'm told he was quite the hunter, & shared deer, etc, with the neighbors...and that the local authorities knew of the poaching, but allowed it---just told him to stop hanging everything where it could be seen.........apologies to animal-rights forum folk...they were hungry...

    and if mel torme was singing about roasting chipmunks, he must've gotten into some of that moonshine leftover from grandma moses...

    i will add "suicide by hibachi" to my list of possibilities for my chronic depression situation...mom will be glad to hear you've helped me in that area, thanks...

    at least "hibachi" brings the thread back to BBQ...

    Posted 1 year ago #
  2. Violet, hon, you're barking up a tree what does not have a chipmunk in it. Mebbe if you reread the spoof and try to imagine what happens if one wuz to press tongue to cheek? As for me still having chipmunk "tendencies", I thought by now it was obvious that what I post here is pretty much always done tongue-in-cheek.

    The way I heard it, Mel only stole the line; but hobos were particularly fond of Grandma Moses' likkered up rodents. A big X on her alley gate ensured a constant flow of tramps hoping for a 90-proof handout. You'd think those chipmunks would explode on the spit, but much like cherries flambé, most of the alcohol burned off slowly. Still, enough remained that the hobos nickname for them was "furry jello-shots."

    BTW- "Suicide by hibachi" isn't recommended for larger mammals, possibly because the things are now made of cheap stamped metal instead of the solid cast models of yore. Volcanoes might be a viable alternative.

    Nice of you to pick up on my subtle attempt to keep this thread on track. In that vein, here's some BBQ humour -

    Q: What lament does a guy sing when his BBQ's been stolen?
    A: The Grill Is Gone, Babe, The Grill is Gone!

    Q: What's a cat to do when the mice are away and it's time for the BBQ?
    A: BYO Chipmunk

    BBQ's contribute to global warming. That, in turn, will affect evolution, creating bizarre creatures best adapted to the new environment. Behold, the Arachnomunk!

    Redneck BBQ gift to give the missus on Mother's Day and on Mom's Birthday.

    Every redneck wants the Tim the Toolman 'MORE POWER!' BBQ griller.

    "Suicide by BBQ - it's not just for hibachis anymore!" This is rapidly becoming an epidemic in the animal kingdom, though some are more successful than others...
    Successful

    Unsuccessful

    Posted 1 year ago #
  3. Messenger
    Member

    rotflmao with tears in my eyes,

    rune if the tree that Violet is barking up at has no chipmunk in it, then it must have an owl or two because your a real HOOT!!
    lol I love the photos :)

    Posted 1 year ago #
  4. Violet4714
    Member

    Rune...

    i very much appreciate you dumbing down your verbose prose with words i am better able to understand---"Mebbe", "wuz"...and i particularly enjoyed "hon"...you sweet-talker...

    yes, your chipmunk-tongue-in-cheek-tendencies are recognized...i actually enjoy a writer that doesn't think he is dave barry, david letterman, & chris berman all rolled into one fab package...

    my tendencies lean towards sarcasm...nonsensical prose...and one or two boxing skills---jabbing & sparring, in particular.........throw in extreme mood swings somewhere there...cook together on either hibachi or BBQ, and voila!...there i am (you can see me in the cloud of smoke that surrounds me)...

    having said that...

    being called a "larger mammal" that was better suited for a volcano than a hibachi...that just didn't go over as well...

    unless, of course, you were referring to a more efficient grilling method...this is a BBQ thread, you know...

    BTW...loved the arachnomunk...and wasn't it B.B.Qing that was originally credited with that song?.........but, dude...ya gotta get your hobo facts right http://www.signals.com/signals/Item_Kind-Hearted-Woman-Sign_HE4652_ps_srm.html

    ...unless that "X" on grandma moses' door was exclusive to "furry jello-shots"...

    Posted 1 year ago #
  5. Messenger, glad you found levity where others may look too hard but not too deep. You must be immune to the gastro-intestinal distress running rampant here, probably from potato salad left too long in the sun.

    I'd hoped to find a yellow "chipmunk on board" sign to alert GAOTD regulars to a growing epidemic. Those little buggers are behind the wheel more often than you might think!:
    Bus, Trolley, Car, Dozer, Armored Jitney, Motorcycle, and even in Groceries!!

    Unfortunately, all I found was a stuffed chipmunk on game board photo. The world must know of this danger!

    Posted 1 year ago #
  6. Dear Violet, nice to know what kind of writer you like. Maybe he's out there working on spreadsheets in the accounting dept? I've learned that regardless how or what I write, those suffering the dreaded kneejerk virus will likely take umbrage, while the uninfected enjoy a giggle or groan, often intentionally at my expense. Have you noticed that GAOTD threads seem to suffer when a temporary improv comedy stage is mistaken for a boxing ring? It's worse than a thread hijacked by an unemployed joke writer for a 3rd party candidate. Pray tell, what was off-putting about references to "larger mammal" and "volcanoes" unless you're either smaller than a chipmunk, or not a mammal, or perhaps a virgin in a famine-ravaged Polynesian village just selected for the high dive event?

    FWIW, my great grand pappy road the rails for a few years. I never larnt what symbols he used beyond his own "Nostradamus was here" sign. More recently, I've come across many of the primitive chalk/coal signs both hobos and gypsies used to pass on tips and warnings. Here's a glyphs & caricatures chart I had in my knowledgebase & glossaries favs folder.

    BTW, I said "big X" (which was drawn inside a circle), one of several signs used to identify "free eats." Dudette, your choice was amusingly apropos, though I suspect far too stylized for the average vagrant. OTOH, if photoshopped using pinch and glow, maybe it could pass for gay gang graffiti?

    Being somewhat (ahem) wordy, no doubt my own hobo signs would've required the entire side of a barn. Sorry, don't know the hobo sign for "grandma needs plenty of good luvin" or if there existed a "hobos welcome at backyard bbq" sign. They tended to party by themselves, sans hibachi.

    Posted 1 year ago #
  7. Rune, Rune, Rune, once again in a pickle on a hamburger bun. I always read your comments with a BIG grain of salt. You just love to stir that BBQ bean pot.

    Posted 1 year ago #
  8. funkymom
    Member

    i just came across this, i'm posting it here because, even though it has nothing to do with bbq's, it's a fine companion (and fair play) for the men's training course.

    Women's Training Courses:

    1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
    2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
    3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
    4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After
    The Game
    5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet
    Too
    6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
    7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First
    8. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking
    9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
    10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
    11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
    12. Introduction to Parking
    13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
    14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat
    15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
    16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
    17. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
    18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
    19. PMS: Your Problem...Not His
    20. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To
    21. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
    22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
    23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
    24. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both
    25. TV Remotes: For Men Only

    Posted 1 year ago #
  9. ch33to
    Member

    WOW!! My cheeks Hurt so bad from grining and Laughing at the back and forth of every1 and rune ...thanks for the laugh

    Posted 1 year ago #

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