maizeydaze........i just had another look at your links to my past threads......they even made ME laugh? you know we really do need a " Miscellaneous Thread " because of how often i see someone write," i did not know where to post this, but hope it fits in here"
and i am just one of those people? and SOME people could let the mind relax and ramble? and the rules? no shouting,hurtful insults directed at forum members, "or even towards Administrators", well more or less the Main Forum Rules, except NO very long detailed descriptions of the engine and brake system of a tractor one was driving, while leading up to the short story to tell, know what i mean? i may regret this!

Paulga

Paulga, "someone out there must coincide with mine"
I seriously doubt it!
What's the one the really got he guy? Or was it all of your responses? :D

copmom........curious?.......don't encourage me? well........when i gave my related words, the guy sat back in his chair and gave me a funny look, perhaps he presumed i was kidding? but i was serious and honest, another friend of mine was his medical orderly so i asked him what the story was? but that was because the specialist had walked out "rather quickly" but returned! i was informed i was "off track","not consistent", i could have told him that myself,...i still can not see any thing wrong with my answers, i just looked at a copy of the record and here are the SAFE questions and answers...just some?
Bullet = Roy Rogers
Goat = Cheese
Plate = Bald
Women = Stockings
Sugar = Boxing
Sex = Kittens
Dirty = Socks
Parade = Naked
Mother = Lode
Sister = Nun
Brother = Sewing Machine
Airplane = Hostess
Officers = Mess
God = Damn
Smoke = Signals

so there you have it, ask someone you know to relate words to the Specialists and see what you get, someone out there must coincide with mine?

Paulga

Paulga
Just read your story about shooting the pheasant while your wife slept.I use to hunt with my dad when I was younger and know how loud it can be especially a (assuming) 12 gauge shotgun going off in a small enclosed room.
I'm still laughing as I type this,I keep picturing the scene in my mind.
Your lucky you got out of the room alive!

Pauga,now you've got my curiosity up!

maizeydaze........thats funny.....but also scary? i don't see BuBBy surfacing! but it's early days yet, i mean there was the time the Army gave me an assessment, i got all the small blocks and weird shapes into appropriate holes, but when it came to," i want you to quickly tell me what comes to mind when i say a word to you " the guy nearly had a seizure
,a story to tell at a later date, watch this space?

Paulga

That's it! You have got to start the Paulga Thread! We've got to gather all your stories together in one place.

"This is the thread of Paulga, an Irish bachelor...that's right ladies, and he has only 5 years left. Follow him through his stories of wisdom, everyday events, criminal activities, pocket contents, diet, movie making and much, much more!

You will also find commentaries from others on this thread. Please, heed the WARNING! This place is not for the faint of heart..."

Paulga......you should write a book.....your stories are hilarious!

Maizey......cute pics.....they really fit.....lol

maizeydaze.......nice links...smile, chuckle,.....just look at the expression on his wife's face?,,,,,i got a look like that for a full week from my ex, didn't speak a word for the entire week, she was in shock? you see her brother would pick her up early every thursday morning to take her to town, so when i would arrive home from having worked the night before, the house was empty,what i did not know was she did not feel well enough to go with him and was still in bed asleep, on my way from the car to the house i spotted a big Cock Pheasant in our field, only about 40 yards away, i quickly grabbed my shotgun and went into the bedroom to shoot him from the window which was open about six inches! i stood on the chest of drawers and shot him, the explosion was huge, then the screaming started........louder than the "i have just spotted a mouse scream," i think she presumed i had shot her, because i would never think of shooting myself.

copmom......yep the dogs and cats here get along fine, they even sleep together, eh,,,lay down together! and they all get along with the hedgehogs,"there are two" plus my cats do not even glance at my aquariums, just lucky?.....but Scooter, another story! about the music to photostory, its hard to choose an appropriate song/tune no matter how many you have, oh scubaguy is also impressed with photostory, and is looking for a vista version, i am sending him some choices, the end product could be interesting?

Paulga

I found a picture of Paulga and his family after the baby with the dead rabbit bit.

And then there's Paulga's babysitting business. The sitters work for canned tuna.

Paulga.. another GREAT picture story!! Adorable little bitty kitties!!!! I'm amazed that all your cats and dogs get along so well. Our adopted kitty tried to climb the chain link fence INTO the yard when we were planting yesterday.. he wanted to be with us! Bad, Bad. Our dog Scooter would have killed it pronto! He doesn't like cats or rabbits, 2 have died because of him.
Now back to photo stories.. I need some more songs! That Enya one just happened to be on my computer when I did the pictures!

funkymom.........people with "offbeat" sense of humor usually get on together and make a good team, it makes life easy when the danger is around? here is another Photostory with music, "Me and the animals" however its 8.84mb and takes about 9 mins to load, be patient, have a cup of "tea" enjoy it, note some pictures are non digital!
http://www.divshare.com/download/4581743-0a2

Paulga

paul- you and my dad would have gotten on really well. he had a really "offbeat" sense of humor, too.

creamypretzel.......i got that! while standing here undressed, oops leather chairs are really cooooool when you sit down, nice suggestion!

Paulga

Paulga's new thread could be called:

WARNING: DO NOT READ THIS THREAD!

Not only would people be forewarned, but the title alone would make everyone want to read it. Too bad we don't have hit counters on these forums. Wouldn't it be great to not just see a few postings, but also see how many different people have read a thread?

maizeydaze.....wacky?.....i was not aware it was noticeable? but now that you mention it! guess i am a tad off par! two priests from the church next door asked could i take them up the lake, i agreed, i asked WOULD they require lifejackets?....then smiled,"my best one" and said you know, religion, priests,god,walking on water?....they did not get it, i THINK they are still coming with me? oh thinking of a thread....while heading off to bed at 0423 on sunday morning.....goodnight all!

Paulga

copmom.....whew thats costly for the tests and shots, here its about £60 euro, but then considering the bite which was abcessed? your lucky you have the free spaying, only SOME places do it free here! oh you should encourage hubby to come over here for a visit, "we like Americans" and to the midlands? here he would have plenty of water, and someone with a boat? and a wacky sense of humor!

Paulga

Paulga, I think you should have your very own thread. What could we name it? It would surly need WARNINGS prior to many of your wacky posts!

Dan, any ideas?

Paulga, you better believe I showed this story to hubby.. he loved it!

After he stopped laughing and watched your beautiful Photo Story, it was like drawing him into it. He's always wanted to go to Ireland! Even wants to have Danny Boy played at his funeral when he goes!

Oh by the way, getting back to the actual topic of this subject.. had to take Mr. Meow to the vet for an abcessed feline bite on his leg, and after they tested for feline distemper, HIV and aids, etc., he ended up getting his rabies shot and the other cat shots. $148 US$ Didn't get him 'fixed' since that would be another $75, but will get that done at a free spaying and neutering clinic through the Humane Society.

maizeydaze......yep creamys warning adds flavor to the story? maizey once i started drinking it, i could not stop as it was about 45cm long?......ok, ok, in this thread i will further post only kitten related items!

Paulga

copmom.......i hope you told your hubby, he would have liked it, the story that is!

Paulga

creamypretzel......nice WARNING! i must add my nose has since recovered!

Paulga

Paulga, how could you? It's bad enough you stuffed that up your nose, but then to eat what was up you nose. Yucky!

Creamy, your not kidding with that warning!

I'm really laughing out loud reading that story Paulga.. and your warning is just as funny creamy!

WARNING!

copmom.......I love that story, thats also my warped humor, i shot a few duck, took them home and was cleaning them out, i was fascinated at the length of the gut inside, so i washed it "very well" shoved the entire gut up my left nostril and headed for my local bar, the guys were always inside on the right so they did not notice my left nostril was "packed", i pretended i wanted to sneeze, and did so dragging the gut from my nose, they nearly puked, you should have seen the expressions, however it did not end there, when i was not looking one of them put the gut in my pint of guinness, i did not know why every time i took a gulp they went quiet, until i got near the bottom of the glass? i spotted it, my tummy gave a lurch, then i got my own back and swallowed the lot, "most of them headed for the gents" they still talk about it, and it still makes them queasy?
oh i left a Photostory for you in http://www.giveawayoftheday.com/forums/topic/3192

Paulga

Paulga... years ago (when very much younger) hubby worked at a boat/fishing marina in San Diego, CA. Woe to the person that came along that they didn't like.. they'd stick some squid in the hub cap of their car and they never could figure out where the horrible stink was coming from! Another time he put a worm in a friends drinking cup, it was covered and had a drinking straw.. friend kept trying and trying to suck up his soda through that straw! Guys really have got a warped sense of humor!

copmom.......I left the cleaning to the three women as i had to go walkies due to the flack i was getting, i imagine your hubby and i in my boat with the warped sense of humor, now that would be a day out?

Paulga

Paulga, you and my hubby would get along great! Both seem to really have a warped sense of humor! Giving a baby a dead rabbit to play with.. gross! Who got stuck cleaning up all the blood?