I'm glad you liked it, Mammy Suzy...
There's more where that came from.

Good one Inas.

Hoping for some "change" too.
Very windy here. Enough to strip a bull of his horns.

...Edited...

A Riddle.....

Why did the lady go outside with her purse open?
She was hoping for some change in the weather.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks:
How much for a drink?
The barman replied;
For you, NO CHARGE...

Hi all, this is one of my favorites. Enjoy!

SENIORS ARE A TREASURE

Remember, old folks are worth a fortune,
With silver in their hair, gold in their teeth,
Stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet,
And gas in their stomachs.

I have become older since I last saw you
And a few changes have come into my life.
Frankly, I have become quite a frivolous old gal...
I am seeing five gentlemen every day.

As soon as I wake up,
Will Power helps me out of bed,
After which I go to see John.
Later Charlie Horse comes along
And he takes a lot of my time and attention.
After that Arthur Ritis shows up
And stays the rest of the day.
He doesn't like to stay in one place very long,
So he takes me from joint to joint.
After such a busy day I'm really tired
And glad to go to bed with Ben Gay.
What a life!!!

P.S. The preacher called the other day
And said at my age I should be thinking
About the hereafter. I told him,
"Oh, I do that all the time.
No matter where I am--in the parlour,
Kitchen, upstairs, or down in the basement--
I ask myself, 'What am I here after?'"

(author unknown)

Divert your course
------------------

This is the actual radio conversation of US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.

Radio conversation released by chief of naval operations. 10/10/95.

CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a
collision.

CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to
avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

CANADIANS: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.

AMERICANS: This is the Aircraft Carrier US LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the
United States Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three
Cruisers and enormous support vessels.
I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north.
I say again, that's one-five degrees north or counter-measures will be
undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

CANADIANS: This is a lighthouse. Your call...

I have one for you;

This is the story of four people named:

Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was asked to do it.

Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.

Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.

Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job.

Everybody thought Anybody could do it but Nobody realized that Everybody would'nt do it.

Ultimately, Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

You,ve got good ones guys. Very entertaining.

Do not push the red button

Take my advice: don't push that da*n button...

:) Nice to see this back on the front page. I must resurrect the what is this thread again as well. Just been too busy (well, if you can call playing games to distract myself busy) recently to have the time.

.

http://music-duplicate-remover.idea.informer.com/proj/?mod=one&ia=10666

Riddle - why did the lady go outdoors with her purse open? Answer: Because she expected some change in the weather - ha, ha, ha....hyuk, hyuk, hyuk......funny, funny, funny.

Well.. for some reason the print on those leaflets and labels are getting smaller and smaller, and that's WITH glasses. Now I also keep a magnifying glass handy so I can read them!

haha that was great. :0 Exactly how i feel as well. :)

Yep it sure does look like some sort of conspiracy,BK !
Try figuring out some of the food labels and reading medicine leaflets...
Either they're running out of paper or they don't want us to know.LOL.
And if you figured them out somehow..you sometimes wish you hadn't.
:)

I received this in an email today....I'm so glad someone besides me has finally noticed this!

We Must Stop This Immediately! Have you noticed that stairs are
getting steeper. Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther
away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to
discover how long our street had become! And, you know, people
are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in
whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep
repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message
until they're red in the face! What do they think I am a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On
the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I
ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that
she didn't even recognize me.
I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair
this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own reflection.well,
REALLY NOW - even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!
Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You're risking
life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in front of
them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the
way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.
Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else
would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or
20? Do they think no one notices? The people who make bathroom
scales are pulling the same prank. Do they think I actually
believe the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let
myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're
fooling? I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's
going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too:
they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one
could ever find a number in there!

All I can do is pass along this warning:

WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!
Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to
suffer these awful indignities.

Wedding Vows video is very funny indeed - thanks for sharing, Robert.

Robert.....now THAT is funny!!!! Good one! Thanks for sharing.
Rox

The wedding vows.... elegant, beautiful, solemn... but... every once in a while....
(I bet you will be smiling too)

Lol.That must be the laziest cat I've ever seen...

That's the problem with cats today. They're too sleepy and adorable.

Some comic relief from the province of Quebec:

Toyota Prius and the Hybrid stopping

http://ygreck.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c5dd653ef0120a867088f970b-popup

The Quebec health care system ( On the bottom right, it says, start here, Good Luck )

http://ygreck.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c5dd653ef01310f827c1c970c-popup

Quebec Prime Minister Charest struggling to keep his new year's resolutions

http://ygreck.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c5dd653ef0120a79e31f6970b-popup

And finally Johnny Hallyday hospitalized in the U.S.A.

http://ygreck.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c5dd653ef01287645f4fc970c-popup

======================================================================================================

Those are all by artist Ygreck (which means the letter "Y" pronounced in French)

You can view more here: http://ygreck.typepad.com/ (The site is in French)

======================================================================================================

This will be all for me at this location (Mirabel) as I am moving to the North (La Malbaie) on Monday ( A 435 km (270 Miles) trip )

I should be back online Wednesday!

Ramblings of a Retired Mind

* I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell
phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford
one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener. I also made a cover for my
hearing aid and now I have what they call blue teeth, I think.
* You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that
people didn't like me anyway.
* I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands
on beer cans!
* I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you
still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce
it.'
* I thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age, and call
it 'Pumping Rust'.
* I've gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest
is falling into your drawers!
* When people see a cat's litter box, they always say, 'Oh, have you
got a cat?' Just once I want to say, 'No, it's for company!'
* Employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in
case of an emergency. I think you should write, 'A Good Doctor'!
* Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What
are we supposed to do...write to these men? Why don't they just put their
pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while
they deliver the mail? Or better yet, arrest them while they are taking
their pictures!
* I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot
more as they get older. Then, it dawned on me, they were cramming for
their finals.
* As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.

I've been shredding old files and paperwork from the 1990's and you should see all the receipts I've found for all the old programs, games, and clip art that I paid good money for! Yikes! Still have most all of them on small floppies. What am I saving all that 'stuff' for?

haha that comic is perfect for rabbit....oh if his wife only knew some of the stuff he's bought...

http://www.boardgamegeek.com/image/682688/aldie

Some of us are missing a chit-chat forum, this is just one of many :)
Let's reactivate them.
Scanning through this thread, I had to LOL and ROFL all the afternoon.
Some of our friends are gone. So is Bobby, I miss her jokes; hopefully she has a happier time now.

graylox

The Toughest Road Surface Of Them All

A piece of road walks into a bar and declares to all its occupants: "I'm the hardest bit of bitumen in the whole of this town!"

The piano player stops and the bar goes deadly silent. After a brief pause, all eyes drop, the pianist returns to playing and the piece of road saunters up to the bar and orders a beer.

At that precise moment, in walks a piece of freeway which says: "I'm the hardest bit of bitumen in the whole country and I'll take you on!"

The tension mounts, other drinkers scatter and take cover. The two braggarts stood, staring at each other, for what seemed like an eternity.

Once again, the door opens and, into the middle of the stand-off, walks a strange-looking piece of coloured bitumen with a blue stripe. Suddenly, the stand-off is forgotten! The now-sheepish braggarts turn their backs to the door, sit down at the bar and stare quietly into their drinks.

The bartender sidles up to them and asks what the problem is. "Shhhh!", says the freeway, "Watch what you say, that guy's a real cycle path."